The Perils of Project Managing Your Teenager's College Journey: The Flexible Approach
Ah, the good old days of being in control. You remember them well, don't you? When your toddler had a color-coded schedule for meals, naps, and playtime, and life ran smoothly. Now your kid is a teenager, ready (or not) for the college application process. If you’re a “Parent Planner,” you might think those project management skills can easily transfer here—but teenagers, with their mood swings, budding independence, and occasional weak executive functioning, are not predictable projects.
The Overzealous Testing Timeline
You’ve mapped out a pristine SAT/ACT timeline with test dates, prep courses, and reviews. The plan is immaculate. The problem? Your kid just got assigned three major papers and is dealing with a nasty flu. They need rest, not a crash SAT cram session.
Testing isn’t just about dates on a calendar—it’s about readiness. Flexibility is key. Without it, your teen might resist or do worse under pressure. Sometimes, the best thing is to push that test date and let them recover.
Essay Drafts vs. Life Happens
The essay calendar looks perfect—until life gets in the way. A basketball game, a homecoming event, or a poorly timed breakup can easily derail even the best plans. Add in weak executive functioning skills—trouble prioritizing, disorganization—and that ideal schedule starts to crumble. A patient college counselor, however, can subtly redirect them, but that takes trust and time.
Creativity needs energy and rest. Forcing a rigid schedule can lead to half-hearted essays written by an exhausted teen. Sometimes, it’s better to pause and let them regroup.
The Teenage Counter-Reaction
The more you try to control, the more your teen seems to resist. That ultra-detailed college plan? It might just be a list of everything your teen is actively avoiding. Parent planners want to know how many essays are due, when they’re due, and anticipated drafts to calendar deadlines. What they overlook is that students are fully aware, yet can’t always articulate, that 5 colleges have a similar prompt, so once the first draft is done, the rest move quickly. Well-intentioned parents can intensify frustration with misguided timelines.
Plans need to be flexible and responsive. Sometimes, the best way to get your teen back on track is to give them a break, offer support, and adapt as needed.
No Plan is a Bad Plan—But Stay Responsive
Having a plan is great, but it needs to bend. Real life includes breakups, burnout, and weak executive functioning. Sometimes, the best support you can give is to be a parent, not a taskmaster. The journey will have twists, and that’s okay—just make sure you’re in the passenger seat, ready to adjust when needed.
